How Not To Be A Supermodel

It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever e book, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is obtainable for pre-order! Here!

An precise e book that it is possible for you to to carry in your palms. Or, should you desire my dulcet tones, hearken to together with your ears. You’ve cherished my revealing life updates, over time, and also you’ve diligently learn via my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I nearly by accident penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the way in which again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my regulation diploma to turn out to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.

You can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my reminiscences and the experiences I had as a style mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very critical. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my e book within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.

And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about by accident happening a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir sometimes have a chapter known as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle via my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Sporting Knickers? No it could not.

So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set up to now, however don’t make the error of considering that any painful soul-searching went into this e book. Let’s not get the mistaken finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it acquired to the insufferable bits: this can be a rip-roaring riot of a trip via a decade of the inconceivable situations and surprising occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and often ridiculous.

Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel

OK, there are poignant moments. In fact there are. In truth I used to be particularly informed, after I acquired the e book deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that may create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently changing into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or nearly falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the tough bits in addition to the entire elements that can probably have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.

However principally this can be a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods wherein I did not turn out to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my character defects and my spectacular potential to draw chaos and catastrophe in nearly any state of affairs.

You’ll be able to pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I feel it’s a reasonably secure wager that you simply’ll find it irresistible. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so should you solely ever click on on one hyperlink I put up then please make it this one. I’ll be eternally in your debt.

Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here

I’ll be again with extra posts concerning the e book and concerning the technique of writing it as a result of it has truthfully been the very best, most satisfying factor I’ve ever achieved in my grownup life. Should you’ve adopted me for some time then you definately’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really completely happy accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve a superb and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a e book deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.